Santa Claus Is Not A Lie. He's A Belief System.

One of my favorite Christmas prints is by local St. Louis artist Mary Engelbreit.  It's a simple picture of Santa Claus, with the word Believe printed above.

One word.

Believe.

Easier said than done, I know.

When money is tight and jobs are scarce and loved ones are ill, it can be difficult to believe that things will be okay.  Sometimes, it can be difficult to believe that we can cope with the hardships that life keeps throwing at us. 

If we are religious, it can be difficult to believe that going to church and trusting in a God who  appears to have forsaken us is worthwhile.

Belief can be difficult to master.

"Faith," said Santa Claus in the classic Christmas movie Miracle on 34th Street, "is believing in things when common sense tells you not to."

In Valentine Davies book from which the movie was adapted, the quote reads a little differently: 

"Those who can accept nothing on faith will be forced to live a life dominated by doubt." 

Common sense tells us that Santa Claus is a myth.  As adults, we know that, in reality, there is no such person.  And there are some parents who struggle to teach their children about a man who for all intensive purposes is a big fat lie.

Is it a lie to perpetuate the myth of Santa to our children?

I don't think so. 

Santa Claus may not actually exist in the real world.  But when we teach our children about him, what we're really teaching them is how to believe in things that we cannot see.  We're teaching them that we can never know the complete truth of our existence, or understand all the wonders of our world.  We're teaching them that there is much that we can never understand. 

We're teaching them to imagine and to dream.  We're teaching them that life is about so much more than we can perceive from our limited point of view.  We're teaching them to believe in magic and generosity, and that the good in the world can always outshine the evil.   

We're teaching them to choose a life of belief and optimism over a life of pessimism and doubt.

Last night, my six year-old put her first tooth under her pillow and went to sleep with visions of a magical tooth fairy who would come in the night.  I might feel like I'm lying to her when I spin tales of this mysterious creature and then sneak in myself to stash the cash.  But I don't.

Instead, I feel like I'm teaching that we live in a world where life is full of possibilities and anything can happen.

In a world where a fat guy in a red suit can fly through the sky in a sleigh pulled by reindeer.  A world where a fairy can come in the night and leave money under your pillow.  Where a heart that has grown heavy from the hardships of life can be healed.  Where things will always get better.

I'm teaching her to believe. 

And I'm also reminding myself.

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Check out the Mary Engelbreit store online if you're looking for some neat Christmas gifts.  She illustrates a variety of cards, calendars, posters, dishes, books, ornaments, etc.  There used to be an ME store at the St. Louis Galleria (and a long, long time ago at Union Station), but I don't think there are any around town anymore.  Her stuff is one-of-a-kind, though, so it's totally worth the shipping charges!

STL Views and Reviews: Malcolm Terrace Park

I've lived in St. Louis for over twenty-five years, but until a good friend suggested that we meet for a playdate at Malcolm Terrace Park last week, I had never even heard of it. 

Boy, have I been missing out.

Personally, I always find it to be a bit of a struggle to find a really good park that the entire family can enjoy.  My elementary school-aged daughter likes playgrounds that challenge her physically and have "a lot to do," my toddler loves a park with lots of open space where he can run freely, and I love a place where they'll both be entertained and I can relax a bit and actually enjoy the fresh air and the scenery.

I also find that, as a mom to a toddler (who is rapidly evolving into a fearless and overly adventurous preschooler), I don't enjoy the sprawling playgrounds where your kids can disappear from your sight for what seems like hours on end, even if it's actually only about thirty seconds. 

Yes, I have helicopter-parent tendencies; I know this about myself and, quite frankly, I'm okay with it. 

The playground at Malcolm Terrace Park is small enough that parents like me can actually see what their little ones are up to, without having to follow them around like a puppy.  Maybe I'm lazy, but sometimes half the pleasure of taking my kids to the park is being able to sit on a bench nearby and just sit.

Maybe  it's like my stay-at-home mom version of "time to myself," because at home I can't sit down without somebody needing me to get up and do something the minute my ass makes contact with a cushion. 

It's like kids have radar -- oops, moms about to sit down and breathe, we better keep her moving . . .

So Malcolm Terrace Park is nice for lazy mothers who want to go somewhere where they won't have to chase a busy toddler.  But it's also really nice for older kids too.  The playground isn't one of those brand new shiny things with plastic astro-turf underneath it; it's more of an old-school, back-to-basics, good old-fashioned fun type of place. 

It has two swings, two baby swings, a curvy slide, a tunnel slide, and a straight slide, a swaying, creaky bridge, and a tunnel, some monkey bars, and some poles to climb.  And mulch on the ground.  Nothing fancy, but plenty of scope for the imagination.

And did I mention the trees?  This, I think, is why I and probably a lot of other people like this park so much.  Nestled amidst homes off of Mosley Road in Creve Coeur, Malcolm Terrace Park is quiet, serene, beautiful, and shady!!! 

Mature, fully grown trees surround the play area, keeping the slides cool even on the sunniest of days.   There's plenty of grassy area for running around or playing catch or picnicing on a fall day, and there's also a sand volleyball court for anybody whose up for a game, or who wants to bring sand toys and pretend it's a day at the beach . . .  

Also very important for parents of small children, both parking and restrooms are located within walking distance of the playground.

The park also has a small path of trails to walk through that makes for a great nature hike for kids who love to pick up sticks and admire rocks, and apparently The Riverfront Times even listed it as the best park for birdwatching in St. Louis.  There is a small rock creek that kids will enjoy, and a shady area full of trees and plants known as Serenity Grove where everyone can relax.

If you would like to see pictures of Malcolm Terrace Park, there is a great stream of Flickr photos at http://www.malcolmterracepark.org/. 

Fun Halloween Activities For St. Louis Kids

With Halloween just around the corner. St. Louis parents are on the lookout for fun, Halloween-themed activities to do with their kids.  Whether you're in the mood for super-scary or just some plain old fun with pumpkins, check out this list of can't-miss Halloween activities around St. Louis.

• Visit the St. Louis Zoo for St. John's Mercy Children's Hospitals Boo at the Zoo Nights, which take place nightly from 5:30-8:30 through October 30.  For a small admission fee ($1 off for a child in costume), you can enjoy the zoo's "non-scary, kid-friendly Halloween experience."  Everything will be lit up and newly decorated, and there are tons of fun things to do.  You can go on a Night Hike, listen to Fireside Stories, enjoy Cackling Chicken Strips and Scary S'mores at Lakeside Cafe, and much, much more!
• The Not-So-Haunted-House at the ever-popular Magic House in Kirkwood is also a great option for families of young ones who don't want anything too scary.  Storybook characters from more than 15 children's classic tales will "haunt" the museum, and a "Haunted Trail" will be set up for older boys and girls.  Costumes are encouraged and the event is free with regular admission ($8.75, 1 and above).  The Not-So-Haunted-House will be open Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, October 29-31, and the Magic House will have special extended hours on all three of those days.
• The Jumpin' Pumpkin Jamboree continues at Eckert's Family Farms this weekend October 30-31.  Ride a wagon out to the pumpkin patch to pick your own pumpkin, and enjoy live entertainment, pony rides, make-your-own-scarecrow, and plenty of other fun children's activities.  The Jamboree takes place at the Belleville, Millstadt, and Grafton Farms.
• We are lucky in St. Louis to have lots of neat pumpkin patches to visit this time of year.  Rombach's Family Farm in Chesterfield has a great pumpkin patch, with no admission fee or fee for parking and lots to keep you busy and get you in the Halloween spirit.  Stuckmeyer's Farm in Fenton isn't quite as fancy and doesn't have as many pumpkins in it's fields, but they have a huge, fenced-in children's play area with playgrounds, tunnels, mazes, and all sorts of fall fun.  Again, no fee for parking or admission.  For a list of more area pumpkin patches, visit the PumpkinPatchesandMore.org (and scroll way, way down to the bottom of the page).
• Many local cities and shopping districts are hosting their own Trick-or-Treat Walks in the upcoming week.  There will be a Halloween Walk in Downtown Kirkwood on Thursday night from 5-7, Trick or Treat on Main will take place on Historic Main Street in St. Charles on Friday from 3-5, and Trick or Treat in the Central West End will take place on Saturday with both trick-or-treating and a costume parade and contest.  Trick-or-treating events will also take place at many malls and libraries; check your local one for details.       
• Fright Fest at Six Flags is always a scary, heart-pounding experience.  If amusement parks are your thing, you'll love this one.  In the daytime, younger visitors can bob for apples and have kid-friendly fun, but when the sun goes down the event is usually best for older kids who like to be frightened . . . 
• There are lots of haunted houses around town too, but most are probably a little too scary for younger audiences.  Visit this link if you have older kids or or looking for some grown-up Halloween fun.

Happy Halloween!

Photo credit:  Flickr

Return to the Sunday Surf: 9/12-9/25

I was hesitant to start doing a Sunday Surf in the first place because I just kept thinking about how then you have to, like, actually commit to having a post for every Sunday.  But then I remembered that:

a) it's my blog and I can do what I want and
b) very few people are reading anyway.

So chances are pretty good that, most Sundays, you'll find a Sunday Surf here.  And if I have a week like last week, you won't.  I'm pretty sure that, in those instances where I don't manage one, nobody is really going to care anyway . . .

This week, however, I have somehow managed to pull a few things together from the past few weeks on the web.

• A recall of many types of Similac infant fomula due to the possible presence of beetles and larvae has made big news in the parenting world.  In an article at The Stir, Formula Recall Brings Out the Mean in Breastfeeders, Julie Ryan Evans poses an interesting question about whether it's ever okay to use a moment like this to tell mothers that this is why they "should" have breastfed.  There are a lot of statements in the article that I don't care for -- because it's pretty obvious that all they're trying to "stir" up over there is controversy and web traffic -- but Evans' makes a valid point that catty and unproductive comments are "not really necessary when women are terrified about a product they may have given their baby that's making them sick."  This unfortunate incident does highlight the risks of formua feeding, but it also highlights the need for compassion for parents who have made choices different from our own. 
• Apparently, Katy Perry is too hot for Sesame Street.  A segment that the popular singer taped for the show will not be broadcast on television due to complaints over her "skimpy" costume.  The outfit doesn't bother me at all, but I can see why some parents complained.  It's a cute clip and a catchy song if you want to check it out.  Though you may be a bad parent if you let your kids watch it . . .

• A two-part discussion of separation anxiety at Secrets of Baby Behavior struck me as something a lot of new parents might be interested in.  (And if you're looking for some blog controversy on the issue of toddlers and separation, go back a few months and check out this post at the already controversial Peaceful Parenting blog, and then read this post post at Raising My Boychick).  The last two aren't new but they definitely provide food for thought, particularly if you're interested in attachment-style parenting. 
• A recipe for Banana-Oatmeal-Chocolate Chip Cookies that contain no sugar or butter at Weelicious.  I know the no-butter-or-sugar thing doesn't sound promising, but click on over and go look at the picture.  They look soooo good!  And the blog/website has a ton of great recipes for babies, toddlers, and older kids, plus daily lunch box pictures for those of us who struggle to know what to pack that's both healthy and fun day after day after day.
• If you live in St. Louis, you don't want to miss Come Play! at COCA on Saturday, October 2 from 9-3.  Find out all about the free event from St. Louis Kids Magazine. 
• Mom-101 always makes me smile, but I particularly enjoyed her post this week about the use of stars as a behavior/reward system in kindergarten.  Are you a star-parent or a no-star parent?  Clearly, lines have been drawn in the sand . . . 
• Elita at Blacktating shared a link to an article called Why African Babies Don't Cry.  I always find it fascinating to see how our assumptions about what to expect when raising children are so heavily influenced by cultural norms.
• A study of 253 California hospitals was released this month, showing that c-section rates are significantly higher at for-profit hospitals than they are at not-for-profit hospitals.  Um, duh.  Hospitals make a lot of money off of birth in general, and c-sections in particular.  That's why Ricki Lake's movie was called The Business of Being Born . . .

So now you've got lots to look into.  Be sure to check back next Sunday, when there may or may not be another Sunday Surf!

Cleaning Out The Closets: 4 Great St. Louis Children's Resale Shops

With an economic crisis still looming over our heads, many families are living on a tight budget.  Often, this means shopping for back-to-school clothes at resale and consignment shops instead of buying everything new from the brand name stores at the mall.  These stores usually offer great deals on the same name brand items, and many of the clothes look practically new.

But resale shops are important for more than just a way to save some money on your purchases:  they are also a great way to actually put cash in your pocket.

By simply cleaning out your closets, you can simultaneously declutter your life and make a little extra money.  And here in St. Louis, we are lucky to have some great resale shops where we can do this!

1. Kangaroo Kids.  Kangaroo Kids is dear to my heart because it doubles as both a resale shop and a maternity and breastfeeding support center.  At the locally-owned store, which is conveniently located on Manchester Road in Glendale, you can take in both children's and maternity clothes, and you will be paid either cash or store credit (your choice) for the items they choose to purchase.  No appointment necessary!
2. Purple Cow Kids Resale.  I've never been to this store on Gravois Road in South County, but the name alone makes me want to go.  Like Kangaroo Kids, you get paid cash at Purple Cow for the items they choose to purchase.  It is also locally owned and operated by the daughter of the woman behind the Women's Closet Exchange, which is the #1 women's consignment shop in the country.  So I'm guessing these women know their stuff . . . 
3. Kids Again.  If you live in Florissant, you might like to visit Kids Again.  It's a small space, but it's packed with great deals.  They'll go through your stuff while you wait and even have a play area where your kids are sure to be entertained while you browse.
4. Once Upon A Child.  With several stores throughout the St. Louis area (and around the country), Once Upon A Child is a big name in children's resale.  All local stores are independently owned and operated, but they are also franchises within the larger system.  Which can be both good and bad.  I was frustrated a few years ago when I took some clothes from baby Gap (which were in excellent condition, and not out of style or season) into the Ballwin location and they didn't purchase them because they were more than two seasons old.  But they did take plenty of other stuff and I think I made about $60 bucks, so I can't complain.

With these great resale options, it should be easy to get that summer stuff moved out of your closets in time to make room for winter coats and sweaters.  And if you end up with items that none of the resale shops want to buy, you can always try to sell them yourself through craigslist or by having a garage sale.  Or consider donating the items to Goodwill or a local shelter.  Even if you don't get the cash, you'll still enjoy all that emtpty space in your closets!  

STL Views and Reviews: Crown Candy Kitchen

Crown Candy Kitchen.

If you live in St. Louis, you've probably heard of it. 

If you don't live in St. Louis, you may have heard of it as well -- most recently, the St. Louis institution was featured on the Travel Channel's Man v. Food when host Adam Richman failed the Crown Candy Challenge to drink five malts in thirty minutes. 

No, it's not the place to go if you're looking for a healthy experience . . .

Crown Candy Kitchen is hailed as one of St. Louis' "oldest and most popular attractions."  Since 1913, Crown Candy has been making its own confectionary delights, and serving classic soda fountain treats like malts, phosphates, and giant sundaes. 

If it's a hearty meal that you're in the mood for, they also serve sandwiches like a BLT that comes stacked with an entire pound of bacon!!!

They've even had a book written about them, Sweetness Preserved: The Story Of The Crown Candy Kitchen.

So being the good St. Louisans that we are, my husband and I decided recently that we really couldn't get away with never having visited Crown Candy Kitchen any longer.

Taking our kids and checking it out for ourselves just seemed like our civic duty.

But we were kind of disappointed.  It didn't live up to all the hype.

If you're looking for a good dose of nostalgia, a visit to Crown Candy Kitchen is like taking a step back in time.  It's even still located at its original location on St. Louis Avenue in North St. Louis -- and driving along those streets you can almost see the neighborhood as it must have once been, before the beautiful, Victorian style homes that look like they came straight out of Meet Me In St. Louis became the run-down, bullet-ridden places that they are today.

The candy counter, filled with licorice and giant lollipops and homemade chunks of chocolate, was neat (and thoroughly entertained my kids during our almost hour long wait).  But, by today's standards, it was small, and to my grown-up eye, the candy just didn't look as enticing as I thought it should.

I'm not sure what I was expecting -- it's not like I had visions of Willy Wonka's factory dancing in my head -- but the reality just didn't live up to the expectation.  I've seen better candy counters in my day . . . Godiva, anybody???   

The restaurant boasts ten booths that seat four, and a few more two-seaters.  So when they're busy, as they were on the Sunday afternoon when we decided to go, you wait. 

And wait.  And wait.  At one point, the line was out the door and down the street.  And when you wait for something that long, especially with young children, you expect it to be worthwhile. 

Don't get me wrong, the food isn't bad.  It is good.  But it's not destination-trip-to-North-St.-Louis-good. 

My husband had that BLT (and I quietly pulled slices of bacon off piece by piece lest he have a heart attack right in front of me).  I had a Breaded Chicken Sandwich.  The chicken was hot, fresh, and juicy, the bread was soft, an the sandwich was slathered with Miracle Whip.  I thoroughly enjoyed it.  But it was also something that I could make at home.  Or get from KFC. 

And the ice cream was what truly disappointed us.  We ordered a Fire Chief Special Sundae that was big enough for the four of us to share (which at $5.75 it should be).  It was smothered in chocolate sauce with strawberries, bananas, nuts, and whipped cream, but it was only so-so as today's ice cream sundaes go. 

It was served in a shallow dish, and as we dug in and the ice cream started to melt, it also started to overflow.  As in a gooey mess of ice cream soup covering our table and an overzealous toddler who couldn't stop eating long enough for us to wipe it up. 

Did I also mention that we were seated at the very first table and that an entire line of hungry customers waiting for a table were standing right next to us watching this all play out?  By the end of our meal, all we wanted to do was get the hell out of that place.

So, long story short, Crown Candy Kitchen didn't do it for us.  There are lots of better places for ice cream in St. Louis -- Oberweis, Ted Drewes, or Fritz's, just to name a few.  At this point, it seems like Crown Candy Kitchen is coasting on their history and their name, and they're popular, well, just because they're popular . . . 

And quite frankly, if you want a fat-laden, heart-stopping meal to go along with your sundae, I think a trip to Steak 'n Shake is a better bet.

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Have you visited Crown Candy Kitchen?  What did you order and did you like it?  Am I missing something? 

Photo courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/irenehsu/with/480934492/

A Vote For Missouri Midwives Is A Vote For Women Everywhere

When I lived in Florida, I could open up the Yellow Pages, flip to the "M" section, and find the names of local midwives.  Same as if you flipped to the physician's listings if you wanted to find an obstetrician.

Try to do this in St. Louis.

Until recently, you wouldn't find any midwives listed.  You wouldn't have even found a midwife category.

Why?

Politics.

In states like Florida, midwives have been an integral part of maternal health care for decades.  Many work alongside obstetricians in their hospital-based practices, while others operate birth centers or attend births in their client's homes.  They do this legally, and even women who choose obstetric care during their pregnancies see midwifery care as a valid alternative.

Missouri women have not had these choices.

In fact, most people in Missouri have no concept of who a midwife is or what she does.

By definition, the word midwife literally means "with woman."  According to The Free Dictionary, a midwife is defined as a person, usually a woman, who is trained to assist women in childbirth. 

In countries such as Denmark, Sweden, and the Netherlands, midwives provide "the first line" of care for all normal, healthy pregnancies and are viewed as essential to the excellent perinatal outcomes these three countries enjoy.

Trained, certified midwives are highly skilled individuals who can handle low-risk pregnancy and birth with compassion and ease.  Their presence within the maternity system allows obstetricians to focus on the high-risk patients who truly need their unique skills and medical training. 

In states like Florida, midwives have been practicing legally since the 1970's and midwifery care is common.  For an idea about the history of midwifery in Florida, click here. 

Now compare this to the history of midwifery in Missouri, which can be found here. 
In Missouri, midwives have been virtually invisible for many years.  Sadly, many politicians believe that they have the right to decide when and how women should deliver their babies, and for decades have been making concerted efforts to criminalize midwifery and deny Missouri women access to the maternity care of their choosing.  

It was only two years ago that Certified Professional Midwives (CPM's) gained the right to legally practice within the state of Missouri without fear of prosecution.  Compare this to Florida, where CPM's have been attending home births and operating birth centers for decades. 

And, regrettably, midwifery in Missouri is still not safe. 

Missouri politicians are still on the attack, with many poised to introduce new legislation to recriminalize the profession.  But these politicians have to be elected before they wield any power over our reproductive choices. 

And it just so happens that the Missouri Primary Election is this Tuesday, August 3rd.

Tomorrow. 

So now, we vote. 

We vote for the candidates who support women, and their right to choose their maternity care providers based on their own needs and desires. 

We vote for candidates who have expressed support for midwives, or even for the candidates who are simply opposing those who have vehemently opposed midwives in the past. 

We vote for women everywhere, because access to quality maternity care is a fundamental right.  It is NOT something that we should be made to fight for.  

Women do not deserve to live in a country that ranks a shocking 40th out of the 181 countries studied recently in terms of maternal mortality ratio. 

(No surprise, many of the countries with far lower rates of maternal mortality are those where midwives are a routine part of prenatal care.)

Nor do women deserve to live in a state that denies them access to the very professionals who have been shown to dramatically improve the outcomes of their births.  

So even if you've never used the services of a midwife, even if you never think you will, you can still consider voting for only candidates who will support women's rights by supporting access to midwifery care.  You can view this handy little chart here to learn more about the candidates' individual positions. 

And yes, I acknowledge that lots of women want or need obstetricians to see them through pregnancy and birth safely.  That is their choice and their right.  But women also deserve both the choice and the right to make a different decision. 

Until midwives are free to practice alongside doctors within both our state and national maternity systems, the fight for women's rights will never truly be over.

A vote for Missouri midwives really is a vote for women everywhere.

Yes, You Need A Doula

Six years and two children later, my husband still talks about the "adoula" we hired for the birth of our first child.  It doesn't matter how many times I've corrected him, gently reminding him that it was "a doula," two words. 

Clearly, there are a lot of misconceptions surrounding doulas.  Who they are and what they do remains a mystery to far too many. 

Why?

Because doulas matter.  From a medical standpoint, studies have shown that the simple act of having a doula with you during your labor can result in a shorter labor with fewer complications, a healthier baby, and less difficulty initiating breastfeeding. 

So what exactly is a doula?

The word "doula" is Greek in origin, and literally means "woman who serves."  There are two types of doulas; birth doulas who help women through the birth process, and postpartum doulas, who assist women during the postpartum period.  Both provide support to expectant and new mothers in many capacities.  Support from a doula is most often physical, emotional, and/or informational.  When you hear the term doula, most people are referring to birth doulas.

For a better idea of what a doula is, check out the new site This is What A Doula Looks Like.  The website was put together by Gina, a VBACtivist who frequently writes about birth at her blog The Feminist Breeder and is home to tons of photos and descriptions of a diverse group of real-life women who serve as doulas. 


Who should hire a doula?

I hear the question over and over again. Pregnant women repeatedly ask what a doula is and if hiring one is really necessary. Often, they don't want to spend the extra money on something that they really don't need.    But the truth is, every pregnant woman should at least consider hiring a doula.  If you know that you'll be having a c-section, a doula may be less of a necessity, (though it never hurts to have someone there specifically to advocate on your behalf). 

And for any woman who is planning to have a hospital birth with minimal or no intervention, a doula is an absolute necessity!!! 

Why is a doula so important if you want to have a natural birth in a hospital?

• Because your husband/partner may very likely faint or vomit at the sight of blood, amniotic fluid, or a head emerging from your vagina. A doula will remain calmly at your side.

• Because said partner will look at you like a deer in headlights if you scream for an epidural. A doula will suggest checking your dilation and remind you why you wanted to avoid an epidural in the first place.

• Because a doula’s presence tells the doctors and nurses that you mean business. You’re not “trying” to have a natural birth; you actually know what you have to do (and what you have to avoid) in order to make it happen.

• Because the nurses have other patients and will not provide much assistance or support.  Labor and delivery nurses are used to caring for women who are lying flat on their backs with an epidural.  A doula will know a lot more about natural pain relief measures and will be more likely to suggest alternate positions.

• Because a doula works for you. The doctor and the nurses work for the hospital and the insurance company.

• Because a doula has been through labor before. Most doulas have experienced labor themselves, and have helped many other women go through it as well. A doula understands the process of natural birth better than most doctors.

• Because if you show your insurance company how much money they’ll save when a doula helps you to avoid a c-section, they just might foot the bill for her.

Where can I find a doula locally?

To learn more about doulas, or to find a doula near you, there are several websites you can visit.  Dona International is an excellent resource, as is the more local organization Doulas of Greater St. Louis.  Sometimes you can also get word-of-mouth referrals by attending local groups for new and expectant mothers such as La Leche League or Friends of Missouri Midwives.

Many women find that they like to interview several doulas because they "click" with some better than others.  Some doulas charge a set fee, while others may be willing to negotiate or even barter based on your financial needs.  Hiring a doula may require laying out some additional cash, but it is a worthwhile investment that you won't regret.

Co-sleeping In the News: How KMOV Got It Wrong

Several years ago, KMOV ran a story that really disappointed me.  I couldn't find it in their archives, but it was a story about an infant who had died while sleeping in a parent's bed.  Although co-sleeping had NOT been found to be the cause of death, most of the story was focused on interviews with experts who explained why co-sleeping is always wrong and always dangerous. 

The fact is, that's just not true.

Yes, co-sleeping can be dangerous.  And if you've followed any of the recent crib recalls, you know that placing an infant to sleep in a crib can be equally dangerous, if not more so.  But there are also experts who believe that it can also be done safely, and can be highly advantageous under the right circumstances. 

Sadly, KMOV's story did not include any of this information. 

But in his recent story, reporter Brad Hicks of Fox 6 News in Milwaukee, Wisconsin got it right.  If you're intersted in a balanced story about co-sleeping, and what makes it safe and when it can be dangerous, watch the full clip below.    



Now, I know that the majority of infants sleep in cribs.  I'm not telling anyone that you should co-sleep.  Every family is different, and there is no right choice.  But parents deserve fair and accurate information.  That is what they got in the story above.  That is what I am asking from our local journalists here in St. Louis. 

And I don't think that's asking too much.




Note:  If you're interested in hearing more from Dr. James McKenna, the co-sleeping expert featured in the above story, check out his book "Sleeping with Your Baby: A Parent's Guide to Cosleeping."  

St. Louis With Kids: Top Ten Can't Miss Destinations

St. Louis is home to wonderful attractions for families and kids of all ages to enjoy.  Some, like our many playgrounds, ice rinks, water parks, and shopping centers, are much like those found in cities across the country.  But others are truly unique, one-of-a-kind destinations that you won't find anywhere else.  They're the places that make St. Louis special, and make it such a great place for families to visit and live.

1. The St. Louis Zoo.  Sure, other cities have zoos, but only the St. Louis Zoo combines a world-class animal experience with free admission.  It's nearly impossible to see all the animals on one visit, but that's no big deal.  It's free, you can always come back tomorrow!    

2.  The St. Louis Science Center.  Rated as one of the top five science centers in the country, The St. Louis Science Center is home to more than seven hundred hands-on exhibits, as well as the Omnimax Theatre and the James S. McDonnell Planetarium.  It isn't my personal favorite, but then I don't really like science . . .

3.  The Magic House.  One of my favorite places, The Magic House is a great place for kids to play and explore.  You'll find tons of hands-on activities geared to every age group; even babies and toddlers can join the fun!

4.  Grant's Farm.  In my opinion, Grant's Farm is a St. Louis must.  At the historic farm, which was once owned by Ulysses S. Grant, you'll  take a tram ride alongside animals like bison, deer, and buffalo.  And, according to the website, they still offer complimentary samples of Anheuser-Busch products.  (Translation:  free beer.  Need a better reason to visit?)

5.  The City Museum.  The City Museum is, well, unique.  It's a self-described "eclectic mixture of children's playground, funhouse, surrealistic pavilion, and architectural marvel" that you just have to see to believe!

6.  Anheuser-Busch Brewery.  Obviously, kids under twenty-one aren't going to get to sample the beer.  But Anheuser-Busch is a St. Louis institution, and tours of their brewery offer a fascinating learning experience.  Plus, you can stop by the stables and see the infamous Budweiser Clydesdales.

7.  The Muny.  Nothing says St. Louis more than the Muny.  The nation's oldest and largest outdoor theatre is a summer tradition for young and old alike.  This summer, you can enjoy classic musicals like Cats and The Sound of Music, as well as the Muny premiere of Titanic: The Musical.

8.  Missouri Botanical Garden.  The Missouri Botanical Garden is home to a variety of beautiful plants and flowers, and is also considered "one of the world's top botanical and conservation institutions."  One of it's biggest draws for families is The Children's Garden, which opened in 2006, and offers over two acres of outdoor exploration and fun for the garden's littlest visitors.

9.  The Butterfly House.  Located in Faust Park, The Butterfly House offers visitors the opportunity to walk through an entire garden of freely flying butterflies.  And as an added bonus, if your kids aren't interested in the butterflies, Faust Park has a great playground and is home to The St. Louis Carousel. 

10.  The Gateway Arch.  No other city can boast anything close to the Arch.  Where else can you ride six hundred and thirty feet into the air to see a breathtaking view of the Mississippi Riverfront below?  Okay, full disclosure, I've never actually done this and don't ever intend to lock myself in a tiny box and ride that far away from the ground, but I've heard that, if you don't have claustrophobic and slightly paranoid tendencies, this is pretty cool.

Next time your kids are bored and you're looking for somewhere interesting to go, you don't have to look too far.  Just remember what amazing places we have right in our own backyard!